I Think I Have a Problem

This is me....a food addict, I think.

Well, after talking to a friend of mine about my week and what was going on with me, she had a suggestion. She suggested that I could possibly have a food addiction. I did some research on it this evening, and took several quizzes from several websites on the topic. Well, since I scored 90% or better on every single quiz, then I would say that I am a food addict. It is apparently just like being addicted to drugs or alcohol. The more I read about it, the more it sounds just like me. It makes sense. I experienced a set back with the weight loss, I've been putting off school work and getting down on myself for it and I've been feeling a little isolated in my relationship (though I admit I've been causing that myself too). When I experience a set back, then I go for the "drugs" to escape from it. I eat to quash the feelings of inadequacy, of sadness and disappointment. And just like a drug, once I'm done eating the food, the good feelings are gone and I'm once again putting myself down for eating it and still bashing myself and feeling inadequate, sad and disappointed. Therefore, I need more food to get that good feeling again. I'm like a crack addict. I need that high every half hour to feel better. Otherwise, I just crumble under the weight of my own feelings and self-loathing. That is exactly why I can do a diet and exercise program for a few weeks, do pretty good and as soon as I have a set back, I give up and I give in. I gorge myself on junk food and things that I can eat easily that satisfy that high. I binge eat. I am in the middle of a binge right now. I can't stop. I have been eating all day today. Even though it causes me emotional, physical and psychological pain, I just can't stop. My digestive tract is in total chaos right now. It just doesn't know what to do with the junk I've been eating, so it just expels it the best, fastest way it knows how. And despite this, I just don't know how to beat it. I've been researching that too, but haven't found a real answer yet. One thing I do know is that I am not just weak. I am not just lacking in willpower. At least I can stop telling myself that I just suck as far as that goes. Another thing that I noticed that a lot of the websites say is that there is no way that you can beat this alone. Just like a crack addict cannot stop without help, neither can a food addict. I cannot afford professional help, so the best thing I can do is to find another person that is dealing with food addiction too. Preferably someone that has gotten a hold on it so that they can share with me some tips and strategies on how to cope with it. The biggest problem that food addiction has over drug addiction is that you cannot live without food, but you can live without drugs. That makes food addiction the hardest addiction to overcome out of all addictions. Imagine if you were an alcoholic, yet you had to drink a shot of whiskey everyday to survive? How well would you do trying to quit?