One Meal at a Time

That is very true right now. If I were to keep on the path I had been on, I would be facing a lifetime of stomach pain and possible surgery. Now that I have finally (almost 3 years after my diagnosis) embracing and accepting the food changes that I must make, I am definitely changing my life, or at least my future, one meal at a time. This morning I had a very satisfying bowl of gluten free Rice Krispies with 1/2 a banana and one packet of Splenda. It was delicious. I think for lunch I will have a packet of those wonderful rice noodles, minus the oil, and a grilled chicken breast patty. Now that I am making changes in my eating, I need to start putting more water back in my menu. I was doing well with it at one point, but I was forcing it, and hating it. I will try to go slower this time and not try for perfection, but just gradually adding more water until I feel satisfied with my progress. I also need to get back into exercising. It's just hard to do it here in the summer. It's sooooooo hot outside. And if it isn't hot, it's raining. So, I've got to get back to doing some exercise inside again. I'll do it, but yet again, not try to be perfect. And not give up when I miss one workout. Progress is the goal! Now, on to my housework and schoolwork for the day...which also needs progress! :)

Tried New Ice Cream Today

I tried a new ice cream today. It is called Arctic Zero. It was a bit pricey. A pint cost $4.98. But the entire pint is only 150 calories! So, after much debate about the price, I decided to try it. I thought I might be disappointed because I was thinking, "How good is ice cream that is only 150 calories, fat free, lactose free and gluten free gonna be?" After all, I used to be the person that called foods like that "fun free"...lol! But, to my surprise, it smelled wonderful and was pretty flavorful. I got the flavor pictured here, Vanilla Maple. I could really smell the maple in it. It tasted very good. The texture is very similar to ice cream or frozen yogurt. The taste is not quite the same. It does not have the richness that regular ice cream possesses. However, it is still good. Will I buy it again? Most definitely. I love sweets and to know that I could eat an entire pint of ice cream and only have consumed 150 calories is pretty awesome! I have also been shopping in the gluten free section and found some pretty great noodles. They are the Thai Kitchen brand and they are rice noodles. The two flavors I tried were Green Onion and Garlic and Vegetables. They are good, and only 170 calories with the oil in the packet. It takes off about 50 calories to not use the oil, which is what I did. I am trying to embrace this new lifestyle and new way of eating for my health. Not just to lose weight, but to keep my digestive system healthy. For dinner tonight, I made one of our family favorites, Chicken, Black beans and Rice. However, I made mine differently. My chicken was skinless, and I only had one chicken thigh. And my black beans were pureed so that I could easily digest the hulls on them. I had about 1/2 cup of black beans and 3/4 cup of rice. It was still delicious! I am trying very hard and I believe I can do this!

Progress

Okay. So, I always try to do everything perfectly. Too perfectly, and then when I mess up, even the slightest bit, I give up and label it as a complete failure. The truth is that it was not a complete failure. I started something good, and I made a mistake. I have to learn to move on and keep going despite any setback I face. That being said, I am making progress on my new way of eating. My Crohn's has been acting up, and I know it's my own fault. I haven't been eating the foods that I should have been. I have been eating foods that I know will send me into a flare up, and it did. Big time. Gladly, after sucking it up, and going on an all liquid diet for a day or two, the flare has subsided. I know that when I eat those foods, not only am I causing the inconvenience to myself, not to mention to pain and suffering, but I am jeopardizing my health. The reason I have such a bad flare up is because of inflammation. When I consistently eat foods that bother my digestive system, than I have constant inflammation. That is really bad on your intestines. Considering that the worst part of my illness lies in the ileum, I am really taking a chance with my health. That is the number one place where re-sections have to be performed due to chronic inflammation. I do not want to have to undergo that kind of surgery nor have to wear a colostomy bag. So, I have done my research and started getting foods that will not anger my sensitive digestive tract. It is not easy. Especially since I have to go nearly gluten-free. I can have occasional white bread or rice, but not all the time. But I have to do it for my health. So far, this is progress in the right direction.
Speaking of progress, I got all the paperwork for the surrogacy in to the agency. We are now waiting on some medical records to be released to them from my previous pregnancies. Then Heather, my contact at the agency, will let me know what our next step is. We may need more paperwork...or we may be going into the database. It just depends on what my medical records say. So here's hoping it goes smoothly. I am kind of excited and ready to get started on this journey!

Paperwork, Paperwork, Paperwork

I feel like I'm drowning in paperwork today. I am trying to get my schoolwork done as the end of the semester is quickly approaching. I just turned in another task for my research project presentation today. Hopefully I passed it. Then I have to write a script and do a five to seven minute video presentation on it. We also had to go to the rental office and start our renewal for our apartment. We will be staying here for one more year. There are about fifteen pages to fill out! And I have to get it all done by tomorrow. Then turn that in and get the next umpteen pages to fill out! I also finished signing all my paperwork and had it notarized today for the surrogacy agency. So, once it is faxed over tomorrow, it is official! Now, I just have to price out how much a delivery and prenatal care will cost without insurance. They need that information to provide to the intended parents so that they can decide if they want to pay out of pocket, or if they want to purchase an insurance policy for me. So, paperwork, paperwork, paperwork! The good news is that I am starting to feel better today, and hopefully I'll feel even better tomorrow!

Sunday . . . Sunday . . .

Well, per the norm, my fiance is fishing today. He fishes every Sunday. It's his "relax day." So, that means that me and the kiddos slept in today! I slept until 8:00 am! Hey, that's late for me! I made us all eggs for breakfast. I had an omelette with a couple mushrooms, mozzarella cheese and one slice of deli ham. It was delicious. I am now enjoying my second cup of joe. Hey, it's Sunday...I can have two! I'm trying to decide what to do with the rest of my day. I know I have household stuff to do, but I would like to do other things too. However, my head is pounding and I feel pretty "blah" today. Day two of my monthly visitor is always the worst day. That reminds me, I better take my B vitamins and Vitamin C today. It helps stave off my anemia and getting sick. I try, anyway. I don't know. After housework, I may just take a shower and chill with the kids inside today. I will try to do my yoga and some sort of exercise, maybe it will make me feel better. Maybe I can get the kids to do it with me! Wouldn't that be great? Hope everyone out there has a good Sunday. Enjoy it...Monday's coming!

That Time Again . . .

This picture is very spot on as to what it seems like for me every month.Why is it that every month when I actually start to feel more motivated to be healthier, my time of the month starts at that exact time??!! It derails my whole feeling and shoves me into I MUST EAT CHOCOLATE, SUGAR and CARBS mode. Mother Nature is cruel. I am sure that she hates me. Maybe she just doesn't want to see me get thinner, or healthier. I don't know. But anyway, I totally feel drained today. I ate too much for breakfast and had two cups of coffee with creamer trying to get some energy. Now I just feel like I could take a nap. Ugh...I am so looking forward to being a surrogate and not having a period for nine months!

I am going to try to push through this. I know the first day sucks, but the second day is worse, unfortunately. So, that being said, I'm going to try to get everything done that I need to do today. That includes getting the surrogate paperwork signed and notarized. I also need to correct my research paper and get started on my presentation. I WILL GET THOSE DONE TODAY. As a matter of fact, I'm about to enlist my fiance to help me clean up real quick so I at least don't have to worry about that anymore today.

Decision Made and Nailed it . . . almost

Well, we made our decision. I am going to be a surrogate. I would say "my" decision, but it really is a family decision. It does effect us all, not just me. I am excited and nervous at the same time. I'm ready to get started on this journey. I'm excited to see what couple will choose me and if we will be a good match. I am also excited for them to get a child or children in their lives. I know they will be excited when we start this as well. I am looking forward to seeing the look on their faces and joy in their voice when they hear that I am pregnant. I definitely am looking forward to seeing them when the baby or babies finally arrive. That's going to be pretty awesome. And I get to not have a period for nine months and don't have to take care of a newborn either! Win - Win!
On another note, I finally finished my research paper and turned it in. I pretty much nailed it...almost. I just have one revision to make in my conclusion and I'm done! Whoo hoo! I am excited! Now I just have to do my powerpoint presentation and take the final exam in another class and this semester is finished! Yes! Then just two more literature classes and I am done with all my core classes and the rest will be all teaching classes. I will have twelve teaching classes and then I'll be set up with my cohort. That is where I'll be assisting teaching and then doing some teaching, kind of like an internship...especially since I won't be getting paid. Then school will be done! Light at the end of the tunnel finally!

As far as my weight loss journey goes, this week hasn't been super as far as the eating. I had been stressing about the paper getting done and doing alot of stress eating and little to no exercise. I did start doing yoga last night and this morning. It does seem to help relax me...so I think I'll continue that. I need to do more intense exercise again and try to curb my emotional eating. I'm trying to work on it. The good part about pregnancy was that with both my pregnancies I gained less than twenty pounds and usually wanted to eat fresh foods, like fruit and veggies. So I ended up a lot lighter than I started, so looking forward to that being the case again!